My picture on the right here isn't just to make people chuckle...it's also to help humble me. That sounds really weird at first, but it's not.
If I had things my way (i.e. I had lots of time to draw stuff) I probably would have made the "I'm a Rock Star In My Head" picture ridiculously over the top. I'd be on an outdoor stage in Hawaii with a volcano erupting in the background (which I timed perfectly using my Geology skillz to coincide with the climax of my show), stacks of speakers as tall as the IV house with MotoX stunt motorcyclists in Evil Kinevil suits flying over the stage, Tigers chained on either side of me (but out of reach) and with a flight of F-16's flying overhead, dropping payloads of $100 bills. And, of course, screaming, smokin' hot groupies everywhere and SWAT teams keeping them off of the stage.
I try to cope with my delusions of grandeur by making fun of them. That's what that picture is; a reminder of how outrageously delusional I get about who I really am. I take a look at my stupid, prideful thoughts that sometimes pop up and pull a straw man on them, exaggerating them to the point of obvious ridiculousness. But often, pride doesn't seem so ridiculous until we magnify it and see it for the monstrosity it truly is. What I am is only a man. What I am is a person who is humbled before the stark truth of my failures. What I am is a lover of people. What I am is a servant. What I am is a lover of God.
...damn, now I really want to draw that picture. It'd be totally awesome :D !
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11 comments:
How do you know that your rockstar dream isn't from God?
For nothing is impossible with God."
Luke 1:37
True... God could have you in mind to reach the masses through rock and roll... stranger things have been known to happen.
But I think I know where you're coming from, you want to keep yourself humble and not focus on YOUR ability to get yourself there, right? Without God, it won't happen, but with Him, anything is possible... keep rockin!
Hugs & Love
I'm not going to assume that my musical ability (what little I have) will take me anywhere. I am going to focus on my major, that's why I'm here at school and why my mother spent almost 10 months working for this crappy cruise line company in hellish conditions. Free time and ministry wise, yes, I will focus on it, but I think it is important to let dreams be dreams and make sure you have reality and what God wants you to do taken care of first.
I will not assume that dreams are in reach, but I will certainly reach for them if they are.
I agree that your focus is where it needs to be at this point in your life but I also believe that dreams are what they are because of God either putting them there or creating us to be the kind of being that would desire such a dream...either way,I don't think it's crazy to Him. I once heard a man say "Make your plans so big that they will only be successful if God shows up." I think God loves taking something that seems like it could never be and making it happen...the whole "in our weakness He is strong" thing. If you don't have much musical talent who would get the glory if you rocked it out? It obviously wouldn't be you..so..ya never know. I've seen a few things even this summer that I was told were impossible turn around...solely by the Hand of God. I appreciate your humility...but realize that it puts you in a place for God to do HUGE things. It's good to stay grounded while understanding that NOTHING is impossible for our God.
There is a difference, and very fine one I think, between being OK with God giving you dreams, but not relying on them (which is where I am) and putting the Lord to the test. ME saying "I want to be a rock star, and since this is impossible because I don't have awesome skills and a good agent, God will make it happen 'cause he's God and impossible is nothing with God." Do you see the trap in that kind of thinking, Joanne? It's not one I'm going to fall for. I know what my dreams are, I know what I am capable of, and I know what I am called to do. I will act within my capacity to act and expect only what God has promised me. God didn't promise me that I would be a rock star, I can tell you that right now.
Do you think that every time your beliefs and mine don't match up it will become a point of contempt? I promise not to try to encourage your dreams anymore if you'll get off my back. Deal?
You're being way too sensitive. This isn't a point of "contempt", and wasn't intended to be that way. I'm not going to make my relationship with God conditional on whether or not he follows up on fantasies and dreams. That's what I'm saying. Sorry if you disagree.
If you want to read my tone as contempt, that's your business, but that is not the case here.
If I spend my time imagining what things I want God to give me, it's going to be a tall list, and an unreasonable one. And I'm am not going to let the "With God all things are possible" lure bait me into a mercenary relationship with God where I trade works and faith for rewards. Besides, we always wind up losing out. A large part of our faith is being able to survive long periods without rewards and providence. I need to condition myself to be able to handle that.
I'm pointing out what your telling me can become in my life, and that I'm going to steer clear of that attitude, because it is a stumbling block for me. I cannot afford to have that attitude because of my nature. I know that it is not your intention for me to have an unhealthy relationship with God. But I am an imaginative person.
There's one line of dialogue from Star Wars that neatly summarizes what we're saying here:
Luke tries to convince Han Solo to save the Princess:
Luke: "She's rich...she'll get you money, whatever you want...
Han Solo: "How much?"
Luke: "More than you could imagine!"
Han replies "I dunno kid, I can imagine a lot."
I never intended to portray God as Santa Clause. You can't supply Him with a list of indugences and expect Him to just bathe you in things that would not bring Christ-likeness in your life. I guess I just was asking from the beginning if you were sure that this dream wasn't a God thing. Sometimes people have dreams in their hearts that seem so out of reach and they give up not realizing that God wants to move mountains to get them there. If you are certain that this is not what God has called you to then rock on. It's a wonderful thing to stand strong in what you know you are called to do. I'm not trying to get you to waver from that and really..if you'd just said 'I know that's not what God is calling me to do" it would have been the end of the discussion. But I guess the way you worded it made me wonder if maybe there was a dream that needed encouragement..because like I said..I've got testimonies of times in my life where I found it hard to believe God was speaking such awesome things to me. If I'd poo-poo'd them because they were also a dream of mine I'd have missed out on the blessing. Anyway..I don't mean to be sensitive. It's difficult when you are reading to know what "tone" they are said in. I'll work on giving you the benefit of the doubt from now on..and I'm sorry I didn't before.
If that is what I am going to be called to, then I think God will lead me there...
He certainly has put a lot of songs into my head to play. I only wish that my musical talent caught up with that.
Either way, I am feeling called into worship ministry, so that is where I will go for now.
It's an awesome priviledge to usher in the presence of God through worship. And it takes a special kind of heart, in my opinion, to be able to lead people to that place. So..I thank God that He calls people like you to do it! Awesome!
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